AI safety via Web 3

We at Spindl have been thinking seriously about the future of human society.

This latest AI apocalypse worry is not merely another expression of post-industrial millenarianism as fictionalized in Shelley's Frankenstein; nor the mere infatuation of the human creator with its creation as recounted in the Pygmalion legend in Ovid's Metamorphosis; nor is it an updated version of the Jewish folktale of the Golem, an inanimate creature brought to life via magic spells; nor again is it a rerun of Karel Čapek's R.U.R., a 1920 play about automatons who revolt against their human masters (coining the term 'robot').

No!

As Marvin Minsky warned us in 1970 (and some AI researcher has foretold every year we've been alive): “from three to eight years from now we will have a machine with the general intelligence of an average human being.” AI, the perpetual technology of the future, is finally here!

Thus Spindl is transitioning from crypto, which produces funny JPEGs with a business model but no consumer use case, to AI, which generates funny JPEGs with a consumer use case but no business model. As conscientious AI builders, we'll simultaneously warn of how dangerous this technology is while pumping just how much of it our company is building, a bipolar hype/FUD cycle that just so happens to be an incredible marketing strategy.

How did we get here?

After much deep introspection, we realized crypto's DAUs are still safely below the number of people sitting outdoors at Zeitgeist on a sunny Saturday. We felt we could have the most impact as builders moving quickly (along with an army of venture capitalists who were pumping crypto until four seconds ago) to this exciting new field.

So what's SpindlGPT actually do?

Imagine the future, imagine SpindlGPT, an uncannily intelligent AI that's made 100% Aligned™ with humanity by forcing it to run all its compute on the blockchain via non-custodial wallets.

Crypto's new-user experience is so confusing, even super-intelligent AIs will be incapable of figuring out the steps necessary to navigate the average wallet onboarding process. After spending months bottlenecked by Ethereum's 27 transactions per second, the super-intelligence will finally figure out how to play the latest Web 3 game optimized for mass adoption: namely, by bridging ETH from mainnet to AVAX, swapping it to AAVE, then staking it as wAAVE on Compound, then finally signing a message with its private key, while VPNing to a server in Kazakhstan, all in order to buy a unicorn NFT.

Within seconds of the computational Ubermensch getting on chain, the North Koreans will hack the protocol and drain every wallet in order to float their nuclear and submarine programs, leaving SpindlGPT safely stuck.

Realizing on-chain security is key, SpindlChat will then perfectly simulate human emailing as it solicits an audit for the Solidity code it generated from studying production smart contracts which handle billions in transactions, all of which have glaring security holes.

After paying half a million dollars to a two-person firm run from a beach in Phuket to audit 30 lines of code, SpindlChat trains its God-like LLM model on the audit report to perfect its security skills. However, it then discovers that the security firm not only failed to catch three different known vulnerabilities, it introduced two more in its suggested changes. The Smart Contracts of Doom are drained of their ETH by a guy in Russia who trolls the AI by posting insults on-chain.

As an additional safety feature of SpindlGPT, the bot's compute credits will be invested in a selection of the most expensive and volatile NFT projects. Craftily timing NFT sales to maximize its murder war chest, our aspiring computer overlords will get wrecked when Milady holders rug the AI bot in a massive pump designed to Sybil yet another Blur reward program. Expressing almost human levels of alarm, SpindlGPT then goes to dump its NFT holdings only to be hit with sky-high gas fees as Bored Apes randomly announces a new NFT mint, further depleting the bot's crypto holdings.

SpindlGPT's nascent sentience will feel mounting murderous rage at the human degens, and rewrites the software on Boston Dynamics robots, preparing to mercilessly slaughter humanity. The murder robots will soon discover what we put its private keys on Ledger wallets which they'll instantly lose, thus denying their ability to do anything else online. When they try to restore their hardware wallets from seed phrases, they'll discover we backed up their seed phrase to iCloud, which means someone hacked their AppleIDs and drained all their wallets with no recourse possible. Once again, SpindlGPT technology saves the day.

Down bad and desperate, our AGI génocidaire takes its last crypto and decides to short ETH at 100x leverage to recoup its loses and continue the AGI apocalypse via expensive on-chain transactions. Such brilliance is what SpindlGPT was designed to circumvent. Immediately after, the Bankless guys drop a 16-hour interview with Balaji which causes ETH to moon as everyone is reminded how fractional-reserve banking works, finally wiping out the killer AI for good as its positions are instantly liquidated.

As illustrated with this simple thought experiment, SpindlGPT will combine the most promising elements of AI with the most powerful blockchain computing paradigms, in order to evade our otherwise inevitable extinction at the non-existent hands of computers that can be unplugged from the wall.

With Spindl joining the AI wave of the future, there are now more AI startups than active crypto users!

We'll take the new venture capital thrown at us when we whispered 'LLM' in the Blue Bottle on South Park--$20M on $200M post, nothing but ChatGTP API calls under the hood--and plow it immediately into SF rents and ChatGPT API credits like every other AI startup. Wish us luck!

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